Sunday, November 07, 2004

8:14 PM

"A little patience, and we shall see the reign of witches pass over,their spells dissolve, and the people, recovering their true sight,restore their government to its true principles."It is true that in the meantime we are suffering deeply in spirit, andincurring the horrors of a war and long oppressions of enormous publicdebt."If the game runs sometimes against us at home we must have patience tillluck turns, and then we shall have an opportunity of winning back theprinciples we have lost, for this is a game where principles are atstake."-- Thomas Jefferson, in a letter of 1798, after the passage of the SeditionAct.

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

11:43 AM


Tuesday, September 14, 2004

1:12 PM

Man its been forever. I dont want to give excuses, cause they dont matter. I am just interested in the moment. Whats going on now that is pissing me off so bad that I came back here to write about it. John Kerry's lead has went away because of a bogus book, and Bush is a lying scum bag that thinks being in the national guard is braver than actually being in harms way in Vietnam. And people belive him. There is now something called Mountain Dew Pitch Black and it tastes more like Blueberry than the Grape it claims to taste like. Or maybe more like Panter piss, dont know. And Jessica Simpson is going to be Daisy Duke!! What kinda world are we living in now kids? Daisy Duke is going to be played by a mindless simpleton that lacks junk in her trunk? Sure she has it up top, but she doesnt have a booty to make all men stop and take notice. and thats all you want from a Daisy Duke. Second, they are getting Johnny Knocksville and Seann Look at my extra N William Scott to play the Duke boys. FUCK. A. DUCK. Have these people that are making this flick even seen Dukes of Hazard? They need a car with a Rebel Flag on it to drive around a city with no, or nearly no people that are not white in it. And the only reason that they get away with this is the fact that the Duke Boys are so loveable that you dont reaslize that they being racist. They dont even realize that people might not like a car named the General Lee, after a CSA general that is so well loved that MLK Juinor day is celebrated as Lee's birthday by some southerners. How the hell did this flick get green lighted? Cause that Super Troopers guy is directing it? The Indian one? Dot not woowoo.

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

2:16 PM

What good fortune for those in power that people do not think
—Adolf Hitler

A man tried to kill a town with a bulldozer, and not enough people are talking about it. In Granby Colorado , Marvin Heemeyer had been really busy for the past six months or so, busy enough to turn a common garden variety bulldozer, the kind that we all had as kids, into a make shift tank in order to reek dozer vengeance on those that had wronged him.
Personally, I think this is pretty wicked cool.
Its like we finally got a real life superhero running around, if only he was wearing a costume while he was doing it. The man made a vehicle that could not be stopped by machine gun bullets, it had a layer of steel, a layer of concrete ,and another layer of greased unclimbable steel on top of that. Marvin had mounted multiple video cameras on various points on the chassis along with a collection of high powered automatic weapons. Inside the cab of the Heemeyer-mobile, Marvin had a couple of monitors and a list of people and buildings he intended to visit and reign vengeance upon. He managed to take care of most of his list before the tanks treads got stuck in some debris and he was unable to continue on. He then...well...killed himself. I think he realized that despite the fact he didn’t kill anyone, and he had caused a ton of property damage, he had the most bad assed day of his entire life. There is no way that dude could ever surpass that day and the feelings he felt while smashing a town to tiny bits. And that’s something that everyone can really hope for, being able to die at the right time. Fate, at her most cruel, takes people to soon or lets them live to long. To live a good life, you also have to die at the right time. Odds are, if JFK had lived , just a bit longer, his presidency would have fell apart under the weight of his own dick. The man shared women with mob bosses and Red China, it was only a manner of time before that came out. He died in Dallas, and became a saint.
Not a bad way to go, really.
Well the brain spattered wife might not be ideal, but you get the picture. We remember an innocence of this country that never really existed, we remember Camelot and John John saluting the flag draped coffin. We don’t remember stupid affairs as much. In the years to come what will we remember Clinton for? Being blown in the White House. I can assure you, that’s all that remain of his legacy, his wandering eye. Regan will be remembered as the guy that ate Jelly Beans and joked about the end of the world because his bulb was beginning to dim, even then. Bush Sr was a prick bastard that couldn’t get a bellboy to believe in him. Some how he won an election. Bush Jr got an election based on who he knew in power and not what he knew about running a country. And somehow Bush Jr got the "I just a good old boy" gene that enables assholes to get away with murder. I have seen this gene in action many a time.
Men that just have that way about them that gets things done. People trust them and like them. Women flock to them, and don’t realize they are being played by a bastard. Because, people with the "I just a good old boy" gene realize early in their life that they have super powers over the rest of us. And they develop into souless monsters. Not all of them, but nearly all of them. When you don’t have to work to maintain human love for you, you are free to treat them like the dog crap on your heel and get away with it.
Just look at how W has treated the world.
He has acted like a bully and a spoiled brat. Both claiming to have supranormal knowledge and claiming ignorance to the fact that this knowledge was faked or blown out of per portion. He thinks he can get away with anything, and has his whole life. He got elected Governor despite the fact he really hadn’t done anything of note with his life. He ran oil companies into the ground and got arrested for driving drunk. That’s about it.
He has made the world a more dangerous place, and doesn’t seem to realize it. He is a religious nut that uses his religion to make command decisions.
Thats what he will be remembered for by history. Not something cool like killing a town in a tank

Friday, August 06, 2004

11:47 AM

Drunken Iron Man quote of the week “ Leave me alone, don’t you have a wife to beat?”’ ::sounds of Iron Man throwing up::

You know what rocks about being out of school? Being finally able to update the site again on a regular basis. That’s the plan anyway. I am aware that I have made more “going to update more often now” promises than…. anyone really. I am the king of broken promises when it comes to that.
Sue me.
I have been accused of not being funny anymore or just not caring about this website.
That’s a load of crap.
Well, I never claimed to be funny. Or to be here to amuse all 3 of you reading this. I am doing this as an exercise, something to do to write, used to be every day, but then my posts got longer and longer and less and less with the making of sense and they started taking 12 to 15 hours to pull together from the rambles that I find written on Waffle House napkins I find in my pants.
Which is to say, its fully possible that the pants I think are mine and the thoughts and rambles I think belong to me are not mine at all, but just something I have stolen or borrowed off a now pantless man.
So that’s the life I am leading now, eh? Stealing the pants off hobo’s and , after drinking their blood, posting their thoughts on the internet?
It could be the truth. Would explain why my pants are so itchy and why they never fit properly…
But me not caring about this site? That poopy cocks that is. With all the ad money I get from…, well the tee shirt sales…, well all the hot chick action I get from writing on a blog…
Well, it goes without saying, that right after eating , sleeping , and using modern plumbing, this site is right up there on my list, but school gets in my way.
Been a busy summer, finished my last class, going to graduate soon, Aug 28 in fact, turned 24 this week. And of course I attended HeatherCon 98 but it was really held in 2004! I got to meet Tasha and Est, people I have internet known for ages and hang out with Jeph of Questionable Content mass market fame. I swear that guy is going to be all publishing his comics on the mass market and being all famous and selling the Questionable Content: the cartoon series that looks a lot like the animation style of Home Movies cause that’s done in some dude’s basement on the cheap. But he will not care at all cause he will be busy on the Questionable Content: the motion picture set trying to steal the Warwick Davis sized Pintsize costume.
And its not that I am calling someone that was goodly enough to have me in his home and cook me good foods with his hands that are the size of a small babies head a stealer.
I am just saying that if something I thought up was all real all of a sudden, I would totally steal it and force Warwick Davis to pretend to be my creation 24/7 under threat of spikey death. Plus they would probally give him the Pintsize costume as an perk or something.
But I say that to say this. Its been a wild and crazy summer. And if I get at least 5 comments on this post by Monday, Lou Sucks will start going Bi-weekly with looking at having at least some new content every week day. Drunken Iron Man quote might become a standard feature, Horrible Movie reviews, and brand new Horrible Album reviews.
New Content, new updates, No waiting.

Wednesday, June 16, 2004

11:59 PM

Trouble at the voting place, Alarms going off, Mass Confusion.
Ronald Regan is dead by God.

This is something that every man, woman, child, plant, rock, and animal in this country knows for certain. He is dead. D.E.A.D.
We have been informed, from all angles, of every aspect of the death of Ronald Regan. He legacy has been greatly distorted in the need to make a reason for this coverage of a rotten evil old man that favored the rich and sold arms to killers and viscous thugs. He lowered taxes on the rich and said that he was mentally retarded and didn’t remember half his sins when they happened.
You thought I would not attack that vile evil man they are claiming to be the second coming? A man that thought that the end of the world was nigh? And made jokes about blowing up the world?
A man that committed sins GREATER than Nixon, and only because Nixon was some breeding experiment gone wrong, the combination of a shiny black beetle and a pit viper, and was caught with his hand in the cookie jar did Tricky Dicky go down and Regan come out smelling like roses.
But then, I forget myself.
Regan is dead, and its been ten years since he was aware of who he was, much less those things he did while in control of the country, or the greatest role he ever played. He wanted to be tougher than any cowboy that he could have played in the old days, he wants to go down in history as a bad ass.
Forget that he ignored the creation of the AIDS epidemic, probably because of who he thought it was infecting.
Forget that Communism fell under its own weight, and he upped our Nuclear Weapons arsenal to a point that we would have killed the cockroaches.
Forget the millions and billions spent on Star Wars, that never happened.
Forget that he tried to cut money to school lunches by classifying ketchup as a vegetable.
Forget that he started the whole “calling our enemies evil” thing that is working oh so well for Dubya.
He was optimistic. People say that about Regan, I say thats a sign of being really stupid. You can be looking for everything to be bright happy lane with naked cheerleaders on every corner offering hugs and back rubs. It’s a world of danger and death, once you step outside your door, your fair game. Someone is going to screw with your life and eat your heart.
Its only a manner of time.
Wait for it.

My brain is being completely deep fat fried by to much paranoia. I can no longer function in this climate of hostility. Its to much badness, people that actually voted for Bush the other day in Alabama was actually pretty high, perhaps they will be stupid enough to think that they have voted already in the presidential election and do no show up for the next one. Judge Roy Moore's hand picked candidates for Judges failed to gain their offices. At least thats a positive. Its something in all this prolonged madness. Nearly ready to give up, nearly. I believe now that I will have a profound psychological break if Bush 2 is reelected. Picture me, lying trembling on a barely lit floor. Used whiskey bottles strewn around me, mumbling to myself about the Dark Beast currently re-encharage of the country. Wondering how long till I am arrested as a criminal against the state, a free thinker in the no longer free re dubya lic. The fate of the human race is at stake, these people are the same ones that elected Richard Nixon, twice.
I need something for my nerves, something that works like a combination of malt liquor and LSD something dangerous and fast acting. Perhaps something that will cause me to forget that I am a member of this doomed Human race. Something mint flavored, something that comes on strong and lasts long.
There has to be a lot of it, and it has to be cheap.
I have no money anymore, its all been stolen by a school system and people that have given me nothing but grief and horror.
But I still work here, and I am still trying.
I voted recently, its something that to few people do in this country of mostly morons. Cattle that believe the lies forced on them. I am not speaking to you, the faithful Lou Sucks reader, that has endured my long absences from you and the world of writing. I can’t abide the excuses any longer, it is time to be a pro about this , by God. The alarms went off when I cast my vote.
Buzzing and whirring.
Something was wrong with my voting card! Dangling chads are all around me, wanting a piece of my liberal heart.
But no, I just filled in a slot wrong, it was nothing major.
They didn’t want to kill me for being a non Bush man.
But I fear its only a manner of time before I am caused great harm for not being part of the group.
Think I am mad?
Think I have been drinking raw rubbing alcohol with Scope chasers?
Perhaps I have been.
But there are rumors, disheartening rumors that have been spinning around the C in C.
That he is claiming his actions are God’s Will, and those that don’t agree with him are disloyal to America.
W is Big Brother?
Perhaps, I am not right in the head, but I am not off base either.
O Lord O Lord, stop this madness.

Saturday, May 29, 2004

12:11 AM

The world is going right to the dog catchers. Its fixing to get gassed for the protection of the greater good, ask not who the bell tolls, it tolls for thee.

Good God I am paranoid this week.
But shouldn’t I be?
Gas prices just getting higher, terrorism looms on the horizon, the former governor of Alabama just got accused of fraud in the first order, to a tune of 100 thousand dollars stolen from pregnant women by the nefarious Dr. Bobo who was (at least at one time) in league with the ex governor. And the city of Decatur, Alabama came close to burning down yet again. This time it wasn’t the Union Army’s doing, but a fire . On Wednesday, garbled reports came into Lou Sucks central, all forecasting doom and destruction in the near by town of Decatur.

“Once the fire hits the Literell Lumber Mill and their butane fed boiler, its all over.” , an overexcited witness told me, “ The explosion will level 4 city blocks and set the rest of the city on fire. There is a great cloud of smoke and ruin over the whole city, its best just to write the whole place off as a loss.”

“ You’re a fool!” I exclaimed, “I would have heard something about this on the news, or would have seen the floods of people fleeing the soon to be fallen city in abstract terror.”

This is not something that I needed added to the great amount of bad trouble rolling around my brain like raw oysters. If anything else starts going wrong, I don’t know what I will do. Its something out of a poem, things fall apart, the center can not hold. I needed alcohol and lots of it, plenty of guns and steak knives. Perhaps some sorta moat around the house. All I need is an internet connection and slim jims. No direct human contact for me, no sir. Just the flow of CNN and the hum of the internet. Perhaps some novels and newspapers delivered in the dead of night by an greasy book merchant named Juan. Press clippings and necessary mail shoved under the bolted front door on an hourly basis. The terrorists are out there, they walk among us. Just waiting to the call to come down the line, and their plot to be unfurled. While, at the same time, our own government is thinking up new and interesting ways of spying on its own citizens. Its only a manner of time before they come and shut all us free thinkers down. Its 1984. The government is becoming a great monster of a thing. Think I am just some raving mad man with a seldom read website? Ho ho. Read this true believers :

Its coming to pass. Everything those nuts in Montana said about America is coming true dammit! How dare they bring this thing to pass, how dare they make the freaks and the misfits right!
They used to have the common decency to HIDE this shit from us. Now they are doing it out in the relative open, Homeland security?
Fuck that shit.

I would rather be dead than live in this non America that we have created. More than that. We are now the anti- America. The Founding Fathers are spinning in their graves harder than when Nixon said that the President cant break the law, its impossible. Even Nixon’s ghost is hanging his head in shame now. Its end game, its all over.
Pack it up, go home.
And now the blasted city’s on fire, moments from utter disaster?

“Decatur is to boring to go out in a blaze of fire and fame.” I screamed to myself as much as to my Witness, “ This is nothing more than an out of hand brush fire, something that will no more destroy the city than a broken toilet seat. I am going to take pictures of this fire and laugh at you when I don’t die.”

I was off. To the ruin of Decatur. But when I got there, I saw not the death and destruction of fabled lore. It might have been a Five Alarm fire, but it was not a death samwitch.
Now I would have to live in this horrible world we have created. The American Dream has long since died, raped to death by the family of Bush from Texas. There is no hope, we are all doomed.
Or are we?
Is it hopeless, or can the tide yet be turned?

This country was founded by men that had ideas greater than even themselves. They were flawed men, that tried to create a country that was better than they were, that was better than any other. They were men that might have talked about all men being created equal while owning human beings and using them as slaves. They wanted to us to have a better country, that was stolen from people that were already living on it. This country just happens to have really good PR. There is hope somewhere in the corpse of the Dream.
Maybe we should all hang on to that, vote Bush out, and Kerry (god love him, he’s all we got) in and pray that the world doesn’t end in the next 15 seconds.

my thoughts and rants